Bill Clinton and Donald Trump, Presidents of the United States, have found in recent years that they are among the most polarizing figures in the country. Both love the spotlight, and both love to have people tell them how wonderful they are.
Now, they’re doing something about it. The pair have decided to put together a remake of Lorde’s hit song, Royals. We at TNB do not have any of the audio yet, but we will provide it when cuts become available. Thankfully, we do have the lyric sheet, and thought it would be appropriate breaking news for those trying to keep abreast of political developments.
For those unfamiliar with the original song, we provide a link here:
And here’s the duet version:
CLINTON-
I’d never met a purveyor of flesh
I don’t care ’bout my wedding ring – it’s a show piece
And then I got a friend in Jeffrey Eps…
And he’d throw me cash toward my foundation
And he’s always like
black girls, white girls, brown girls, Asians
sexual slavery’s the focus of our days and
I don’t care – I’m using people and it’s a dream
And he’s always like
Jet plane, island, teenaged on a gold leash
blackmail cameras watchin’ every sweet piece
He don’t care… got boys for Spacey standing over there
Cause we’re hanging with royals
Prince Andrew and the Saudi
The normal laws don’t cover me
It’s either this or Hillary
And I was a ruler
Presidential immunity
And baby I ruled…
Now I live my fantasy
TRUMP-
My friend Jeffrey, he liked them young
With broken kids pulling a train at his parties
And everyone who knows me knows
That I’m fine with this
I only care ’bout money
And he’s always like
Black girls, white girls, brown girls, Asians
Sexual slavery’s the focus of our days and
I don’t care, I’m not putting on no moral airs
And he’s always like
Takes the Fifth before I get indicted
Cheat him on a deal he don’t feel slighted
He don’t care. He’s got Hawking leering over there
And I’m hanging with Royals
Prince Andrew and the Saudi
The normal laws don’t cover me
I’ve got Ivanka bouncing on my knee
I am now a Ruler
Presidential immunity
And baby I’ll rule
I will live my fantasy
-BOTH for the bridge
The Senate covers everything
And I might as well just be a king
Life is great without a care
Dershowitz is walking without underwear
And we’re treated like Royals
Prince Andrew and the Saudi
We’re both above the law you see
We could just shoot you on the street
We are simply rulers
Presidential immunity
And baby we’ll rule
We can live our fantasies.
Apparently afterward, some squabbling is heard on the recording, as they both accused the other of arranging the death of Jeffrey Epstein. This led to the B-Side, which is a remake of a classic Sonny & Cher duet, renamed “It Was You, Babe.”
