TNB Night Owl Presents: Snark Bites! Conservatives Say (and Do) the Darnedest Things

12 October Carp Tail (second version) Photo by Howard J.

Today saw Justice Arthur Engoron deal a heavy blow to former POTUS Donald Trump and two of his devil spawn adult offspring. (I absolutely refuse to refer to ostensible adults as “children.”) In one of the more ridiculous legal arguments ever made, Alina Habba — one of Trump’s crack-team of attorneys who’ll apparently work for free — said Trump was a member of a “protected class.” When the justice pressed the matter asking what protected class Trump was a member of, Habba said:

“His political speech,” Habba replied. “If he was not sitting as a Republican and was not a former president who might run again, this would not be happening. So she is discriminating against him for that.”

Raw Story, February 17, 2022

Basically, she’s making the same argument Sarah Palin’s lawyers made in her defamation suit against the New York Times which was thrown out earlier this week: People hate us because we’re republicans/conservatives/trumplicans and we should be able to take legal action against them when they do things to us or say things about us we don’t like.

Sorry, Charlie. Just because people don’t agree with your politics doesn’t mean they’re abusing you and you deserve to be in a legally protected class.

Hey, do y’all remember when pundits and pols on the right would call lefties snowflakes? Yeah, good times.

Not to be outdone, Trump issued a statement his publicist echoed through her Twitter account:

He has a strong opening there, about how Hillary Clinton broke into the White House, his apartment, buildings he owns, and his campaign. Wow! Hillary was pretty busy! Maybe she should add “cat-burglar” to her resume?

Of course, as usual, it trails off into nonsense, because it’s always been hard for him to string more than twenty words together and have it all make sense. (Person, woman, man, camera, TV! He’s such a stable genius, y’all!)

Moving on…

Then there’s Charlie Kirk, who tells a story about Stasi waiters

Is anyone else getting tired of the “Everyone who’s mean to us is a Nazi!” stuff from the right? And I don’t know about you, but if Biden and the CDC are gonna open up some Covid-vaccine-refusenik internment camps, I wish they’d just hurry up and do it already.

He closes with this:

And so, it really sunk in and here I am coming back home, you know, and being treated like I’m visiting East Germany. Literally, no exaggeration.

Media Matters, Feb 17, 2022

Literally? Literally, Charlie? East Germans would be up in arms about being asked to show their vaccination records?

People who appear to be barely old enough to shave maybe shouldn’t compare their First World Problems(tm) with people who lived under actual tyranny.

In the “Oh, the irony!” category, the pro-free speech app Gettr apparently isn’t as pro-free speech as advertised. The anti-cancel culture peeps are cool canceling anyone from their site who says anything negative about their favorite Chinese billionaire, Guo Wengui.

*shocked face*

As usual, this is an open thread; so feel free to post anything you like. And, as always, stay snarky, my blender friends!

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