(Open Thread) Snark Attack Presents Son of Snark Bites

12 October Carp Tail (second version) Photo by Howard J.

A lot of little nibbles of snark, because sometimes, that’s how we roll.

At ten, I was into Barbies and “Emergency!” (Well, more specifically Randy “the hottie” Mantooth.) My grandniece who’s that age is into Barbies and “The Masked Singer.” So, some things change, and some things stay the same. But I can’t imagine any child would want to celebrate a happy occasion like a day where they get cake and presents by hating someone. What kind of broken person would decorate their child’s cake like that? Seriously. Can’t you give politics a rest for one effing day? Can’t you put your child’s innocent happiness ahead of your toxic politics for one stinking day?

And, for the record (I realize this is going to surprise many of you), I didn’t even say “pee” and “poop” when I was ten. It was “#1” and “#2.” I can’t imagine someone writing “fuck” on a child’s birthday cake.

Maybe I’m just getting old.

Next up:

We don’t have a King of America, you stupid bitch. And if we did, you wouldn’t vote for him, because Kings aren’t elected.

Sorry, I was trying not to be a potty-mouth today, but, well. Their stupid makes me angry.

Okay, this made me LOL:

This post is coming off the tracks. Maybe it’s because I’m tired, and thus, easily amused. But anyhoo, blame this all on Tiff.

So she sent me this tweet:

Take a look at the Reuters article at the bottom of Elon’s first tweet. It says, “Twitter Incestimated.” Now, we all know what it’s supposed to say, but that running together just cracked me up. Like I said, easily amused…

And now for something different. Apparently, Jim Banks (R-IN) doesn’t do math very well at all…

I’m thinking this might have a little something to do with how our country has such a flaming big deficit: nobody in DC can do simple math. If this is your brain on “old math” education, maybe we should switch to the “new math” after all…

Next up: David Freddoso might have a blue checkmark following his name, but he’s not too bright…

Read the Lancet article; it makes far more sense than any argument I’ve seen coming from the right about why the SC overturning Roe is a good thing.

David thinks people whose professional background is medicine shouldn’t expound about law. I’d suggest that people who are politicians and judges aren’t best suited to dictate to anyone what medical treatment they should and shouldn’t be allowed to receive. But maybe that’s just me?

Maddie set this thing of beauty up perfectly for us…

Yes, instead, settle for unqualified lunatics who do nothing but feats of performative assholery all day long!

Maddie’s opponent is not just a RINO…

Next, full disclosure: I have not read the article that’s linked in this tweet below. The headline itself is ridiculous enough on its own. I don’t think I could take the full treatment.

Yeah, I can’t. I just can’t, y’all.

So, that wraps up this column. Hope you got a few laughs out of it. As always, this is an open thread, so feel free to discuss whatever you like in the comments down below. And if you enjoy this (or any other article on the site), be sure to click the heart icon!

Finally, tomorrow’s noir film is “The Killer Is Loose.” You can watch it with me on TCM.

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