Happy (?) Friday the 13th! Hope your day goes smoothly, in spite of the reputation Friday the 13th has for bringing bad luck, mayhem, and death.
I have two special kinds of stupid to share with you today. The first is Glenn Greenwald and Tucker Carlson, talking about how the MAGA crowd needs the “safety valve” of making death threats on Twitter, because otherwise they have no choice but to go medieval on the Capitol and our legislators. I’ve done a complete transcription of the 1:27 video, so you can just read the stupid instead of having to hear it, as well. But in case you want to listen along, here’s the video:
As always, I’ll start with the mark’s comments, and then I’ll add in my own snarky responses.
Glenn Greenwald: Everyone knows, you know, there’s the, there’s all kinds of studies about how, you know, people talk a lot about journalists love to talk about their death threats they get.
Tucker Carlson: Yeah.
Glenn Greenwald: You know, online. And everybody knows that if you get, like, the people who are really planning on coming to kill you aren’t the ones tweeting at you that they’re gonna do that, right?
Tucker Carlson explodes in laughter.
Glenn Greenwald: Like being able to tweet that is like an outlet.
Tucker Carlson: Right.
I’m sure that Glenn and Tucker laugh it off when they get death threats, right? They don’t bother getting the FBI involved; they’re not scared at all! I’m sure they don’t wet themselves and hide in the panic rooms of their mansions until it’s safe to come out. Nope. They’re mega MAGA macho dudes!
Glenn Greenwald: You know, just like people say watching pornography is an outlet and alleviates the desire to go rape, when you give people a channel to express themselves, to express their anger and their critique–and whether it’s like, QAnon, which I think happened to be more of like, kind of protest movement, you know, were saying things that we know were upsetting elites and that’s kinda part of why we’re sitting here–
Me: QAnon says batshit crazy, untrue things and reinforces the idea that those who believe in it are the victims of a vast conspiracy against them. That’s not healthy to cling to lies as if they’re true, to the point that you’re willing to fight and die to defend those lies.
So, this isn’t a “safe” outlet like porn. (And, frankly, I don’t buy that argument, either…)
Tucker Carlson: Yes.
Glenn Greenwald: –it became kind of, kind of like an identifier of dissent.
Me: No, it became an identifier of people who are mentally unstable and need psychiatric intervention.
Glenn Greenwald: When you crush it, you’ve now taken away the outlet, the peaceful outlet, that people have. And when you tell them they can no longer use the internet to gather with like-minded people, and exchange grievances and organize, what do you think is gonna happen?
Tucker Carlson: Well, exactly!
Me: Wait, what? Who told them they can’t use the internet? I see those batshit cray-crays all over the place, spewing their batshit crazy-pants conspiracy theories. Does Twitter try to silence them? Yes, but they can still get on GETTR or Parler and spew all the QAnon and Big Lie bullshit they want. Heck, they even have Truth Social now! And if all that’s not enough, they have people like Tucker Carlson and many, many others who will not only defend the crazies, but wind them up to be even crazier, through their websites, radio programs, and RW media networks, like Fox “News.” Because that’s what this segment is about: defending the dangerous crazies and pretend someone else is responsible for their insanity.
Not only that, but they spread their message even without the internet. via their churches and various social groups. Nobody is preventing them from spreading their infectious lies.
Moreover, when crazy people get together and spin their yarns, it reinforces for them all the “reality” of the world they’re living in, where Hollywood and DC elites cannibalize children so they can stay young forever. Or whatever this week’s batshit crazy conspiracy of choice is. Frankly, I can’t keep up anymore.
Glenn Greenwald: They, they have no other alternative but to engage in destabilizing and, and, and violent ends.
So if you don’t let us spread our violent threats on Twitter, you’re going to force us to be violent out in the real world.
Is it just me, or does that sound like some kind of a threat?
Also, I’m not sure he meant to, but was that Glenn Greeenwald just admitting what most of us already knew: that it was frustrated Trump fanatics who were responsible for Jan 6th?
So, you see, being denied access to Twitter made them violent, y’all.
Except, no, it didn’t. They got together with all their little seditionist pals on the internet — maybe they had to do it in the back allies and gutters instead of out on Main Street, Twitter, USA — and plot and plan how they were going to prevent Joe Biden from being named POTUS.
Glenn Greenwald: I think a lot of what we saw on January 6th was that notion, that, well, we don’t really have the democratic process or the basic civil liberties that we were taught as children we can expect by being in the United States; and so gathering together and protesting and storming things is the only option we have left.
Tucker Carlson: Well, yeah, because they took away the pressure relief valves.
Me: Maybe if people like Tucker Carlson, Glenn Greenwald and their ilk weren’t constantly enraging their audiences and filling their heads with conspiracy nonsense, they wouldn’t need any “pressure relief valves.”
I’m just going to note that when it was black people going out and protesting how they’re treated by police, people like Tucker and Glenn weren’t defending their actions or their anger. Just like they’re not defending those who are upset about the possibility that Roe’s about to be overturned by the fanatical religious conservatives who make up the majority of justices on the court.
Moving on to Stupid #2, we have Patrick Howley talking about demonic artificial breastmilk. Y’all, I don’t think I can even…
Patrick “Howler Monkey” Howley: So, it’s the FDA regulatory action that’s keeping this plant closed.
Me: Yeah, how dare the Food and Drug Administration ensure we have a safe supply of baby formula. Those bastards!
The Howler Monkey Dude: Now, Bill Gates, his fund Breathrough Energy Ventures, and Jeff Bezos is on the board, Mark Zuckerberg is on the board, Richard Branson is on the board. They’ve put $3.5 million into a company called BioMilq — with a “Q” at the end — in North Carolina to make artificial breast milk.
Me: Are we sure this isn’t a QAnon conspiracy giving itself a wink and a nod? Because spelling milk with a “Q” just seems a dead giveaway…
Mr. Howler Monkey: So, a technocratic, non-human, perhaps cursed, demonic kind of milk they hope to have on the market in the couple of next years.
Me: “Curs-ed and demonic” breast milk. Seriously, was this guy dropped on his head several times too many as an infant? Did his parents play football with him, using him as the ball? Because… just wow.
That Howley Guy: So, in addition to Bill Gates’, you know, mosquito army, and his attempt to block the sun, basically, he’s just like the peanut allergy table in the high school cafeteria as a worldwide super villain.
Me: Um… I don’t know whether to begin with the mosquito army or the attempt to block the sun… I just… can’t.
So if you have a better rejoinder on that topic for Mr. Howley, please feel free to share it in the comments below.
As always, this is an open thread, so talk about whatever you like. Stay snarky, my Blender peeps!
BTW, Sunday’s movie is “The Killer Is Loose.” It’s another I haven’t seen. Hope some of you watch it with me!